Playlouder - Music is the Network

Crunk madman with a mouthful of metal, Jonathan 'Lil' Jon' Smith, has declared to the world that he is now a maker of fine wines.

This is on top of his illustrious music career and massively tasty Crunk!!! energy drink. (Apparently he was going to call in Crunk Juice but already had an album of the same name and didn't want to be forced into legal action against himself).

The wine, unfortunately, has no crunk in its name, and will be known by the label Little Jonathan Winery. Maybe there's some sort of crunkfruit he can blend with a fine Chardonnay?

"The wine is more nature: I wanted to not just have a direct connection, but make it just a little bit more upscale than regular 'Lil Jon.' ... This is not no ghetto Boone's Farm; this is some real wine," spouted the inebriated nutcase. 

Who will be the first to suggest a charity cheese and wine reception with winemaking crunkist Lil' John teaming up with cheesemaking bassist Sir Alex James?

Me, that's who.

But I won't be the last.