Playlouder - Music is the Network

It is as we all feared. South London's Will Bevan is in fact the accurséd long-time enemy of humanity, GIGANTOPITHECUS.

Gigantopithecus has been long known for trying to drive humanity to the brink of extinction using dark, miserable, repetitive ambient music that reminds us all how worthless we are (and how mighty and superior he is).

Now it has emerged that Mercury Music Prize-winning Mercury Music Prize nominee Will 'Burial' Bevan is in fact an huge, an hairy, an stinking Gigantopithecus, and not, as he 'allegedly' 'revealled' on his 'MySpace' page, a normal human with a face and a music career and a hoodie.

By god he'll kill us all!!!(!)

AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh................................*