We here at PlayLouder have hired a sorceress (and payed her in dismembered pig parts) to guess what's going to happen in the charts this Sunday, and by God the old hag is acurate (just yesterday she told us Luke would buy a silly hat that makes him look like Hercule Poirot before he started shaving, and low and behold what does he come in looking like?) Anyway - do your worst Mystic Mug...
"Eye of goat, and thimble appendage of Dominic Masters, the Arctic Monkeys will storm the top of the charts this weekend! Ah ha ha ha ha! Wizards themselves, they've got the general public believing they're really good when in fact they smell a bit like a witches' roomy glove box."
And what else?
"Magician Diddy will exhume the bloated body of the Notorious BIG and get the old bugger rapping again with the help of Nelly just behind. And that nice Will Young will not be entering the No.2 slot this time, but will most likely make it to No.3..."
Who else can we expect to see in the top 10 Grotbags?
"Son of Dork, and maybe Hi-Tack. Belle and Sebastian will be just outside."
Any what else?
"!Forward Russia! and Test Icicles will make the lower end of the Top 40, though Sway is just likely to miss out. Neh heh heh heh heh..."
And the albums?
"Hard-Fi are No.1 in the albums, which has nothing to do with the heavens, but does have something to with the fact they've been advertising the bloody thing 1043 times a day on the the telly since early-November..."
